Tempers flare at Walmart...more news at 11

So, for days I have been trying to post about our recent trip to Walmart and Maya's subsequent tantrum, but I couldn't think of a way to make it funny. That's when I realized...



IT'S NOT FUNNY!!!!!!!!



My sweet, angelic daughter has been struck by the terrible twos. As a parent, I have heard tell about the TTs (terrible twos) and all that goes along with them. But, no one told me that they actually start at 18 months! I assumed (yeah, yeah don't assume) that the terrible TWOS would start at, well, TWO! I am not ready for this, and I don't think I am handling it that well either.



Let me sum up for you our trip to hell Walmart. It was to be a quick in and out trip to purchase a sandbox. Yes, that was mistake number one. Who goes to buy a sandbox on the 3rd of July? Of course they didn't have any. This sandbox idea had been in my head since April. Why I didn't act on it then I'll never know.



Anyway, I digress...



In place of a sandbox I found a lovely blue bouncy ball on sale for $2.50! I grabbed one for Maya and the proverbial shit hit the fan. She wanted to hold it but kept dropping it. I put it in the basket and she screamed a scream to wake the dead. I gave it to her, she threw it. I put it back in the carriage (because apparently I hadn't learned my lesson) and she completely melted down. I suggested that we just leave, but we were looking to replace some lost pacifiers for Eli and a snack trap for Maya. I then had the bright idea to let her down to play with her new ball.



BIG MISTAKE!



Don't tell anyone, but I should have listened to Steve when he pointed out that letting her out of the carriage was a bad idea. She jumped on the ball, flipped over and hit her head on a rack. *sigh* More crying, screaming, seething, gnarling, etc., etc. until we made it to the check-out. That's when it happened. Maya's head rotated 360 degrees and she vomited pea soup.



Or at least it seemed that way.



Actually, I am not quite sure what happened. I looked at Steve and there was fear in his eyes. What the %$#& just happened to our child?



The nice man in front of us-who for some unknown reason was buying 7 loaves of Wonder bread-asked if we would like to go ahead of him. Feeling that we could handle our child and that this would be a good lesson for her that she cannot always have what she wants when she wants it, I thanked him but said we were OK.



OK? We were so far from OK. She was beyond hysterical. She was thrashing and screaming and crying real, huge tears. The entire store could hear the commotion in aisle 3.



Oh. My. Gawd!



The cashier was shaking. The man ahead of us was murmuring about how they should have more lines open. The other customers were just staring and I started to laugh. I just couldn't help it. There was nothing I could do. The cashier started panicking and telling us how she wished she was an octopus with 8 arms so she could move faster. In the commotion, she dropped our bag and I nearly fell over laughing. I had tears in my eyes from fits of hysterical laughter. I even got Steve smiling, who until now was looking rather peaked.



All over a stupid, blue ball.



Steve picked her up and threw her over his shoulder as we ran walked with heads held high out of Walmart.

Steve then proclaimed that he would never step foot in another Walmart. Ever. You see, according to Steve it was *karma* that caused our child's tantrum. Karma because we should have known better than to shop at "evil" Walmart.

But where else could I buy a big, blue bouncy ball made in China for only $2.50???